A beginner’s guide to butt stuff
How to explore the pleasure centre you’ve been avoiding
By Hanna Deeves, Sex Columnist
Go out and buy a nice quality lube, you’ll need lots of it because the anus does not self-lubricate. If you are using silicone toys, use water-based lube. If you are using non-silicone toys, using fingers, or having intercourse, you can use silicone based lubes. Anal-specific lubes are typically silicone based and they are thicker and last longer.
You will need condoms because anal sex is still sex. You need to protect yourself, and be aware that switching holes with whatever you’re using can cause infections if you do not clean off first.
Now obviously, cleanliness is always a concern here. And there are a bunch of products out there designed to help clean you out. But I won’t even get into those because they aren’t good for you.
Really all you need to do is eat healthy, which you should be doing anyways, and go to the bathroom beforehand. If you do this, you should be fine. There is always the chance of an accident, but it just comes with the territory. You know what you’re signing up for.
If you are doing this with a partner, make sure to talk it out with them first. Make it clear what you are comfortable with. Come up with a safe word if you need to.
Alright, so you’re ready to get hot and heavy, what now? First of all, foreplay is extremely important. Making sure you are nice and aroused will help you relax and being relaxed will make penetration more comfortable.
Go slowly and listen to your body because it knows what’s best. If something hurts, stop! This experience is not supposed to be painful. A little uncomfortable at first maybe, but not painful.
Pain is your body’s way of telling you something is wrong. It is a complete myth that anal sex is supposed to hurt. If you push through it, you can damage your body. Lube is your best friend in reducing risk of pain. Move slowly at first, and then speed up if you would like.
As a general rule, if you want to go with more than just a finger, I recommend starting small and working your way up. This will reduce the possibility of pain. You could start with a finger, then two, then three, or with a small anal plug or other toy, and size the toys up.
I know it sounds inconvenient, but anal really isn’t something you should just dive into on a whim. With any size, make sure that every time you start slow and gentle, and let your body adjust to what’s happening before you decided to get rough with it. Your body will thank you.
*For a little something extra, check out thereflector.ca for a toy review!