Sex Column: Fellatio’s finest
Earn your crown as BJ King or Queen with these tricks
According to some statistics that I just made up, 92 per cent of women believe that they give the best blowjobs in the world. Now, that just doesn’t add up, so give a few of these tricks a try and win your crown as the queen or king of BJs.
If you walk away with anything from this article, let it be “be enthusiastic”. Your guy wants you to be excited about giving him a blow job because he is super thrilled about getting one. If you make it look like work and you’re dreading the idea of doing it… well, your guy won’t be able to enjoy it to the fullest. Here’s a tip: maybe play some amped up music that you can jive with. You’ll end up feeling more excited when you realize that your oral motions have fallen in sync with the beat.
Men are visual
Fact: men pay more attention to the visual side of things. They want to see you, so remember to look up and connect eyes with your beau. There is nothing sexier to a man than you on your knees with his member in your mouth. Feel free to get creative and put on a bit of a show. But don’t go full porn star because not all guys are into you spitting on their junk — it’s best to play this by ear.
As always, this is vital in any sexcapade. Ask him, “What do you want me to do for you?” He will (usually) happily oblige and give you a personalized user’s manual for his Johnson.
Every penis is different
Just like vaginas, each penis is totally unique, so don’t join forces with a new partner expecting that the same old tricks will work for this guy. Sensitivity levels vary in each man’s rod, so be mindful of that. Those who are left uncircumcised, for instance, tend to be more sensitive than the foreskin-less fellas. On the other hand, circumcision can totally change the way that men experience pressure and friction, so keep that line of communication open and don’t be afraid to ask questions. Listen to his body language because that can tell you a lot about what to continue, and what to stop immediately. Some men like it when you focus on the ridge along the bottom side of the head of the mushroom cap. Others prefer it if you focus on the frenulum, or the magical “V” shape of the head. Some guys like it if you go real deep, others like it when you pop their balls in your mouth. Do what you’re comfortable with, but don’t be afraid of trying new tricks with your man.
Use your hands
Don’t forget that you have two hands to use as well. Touch is incredibly important to make your partner finish with a stellar fireworks show. Use one or both of your hands to stroke away — this definitely helps if you are uncomfortable with deep throating, or if he is just hung like a moose. Your hands help give you some more control too, especially if he’s a thruster. Switching between an old-fashioned hand job and tongue twisters allows you to take a bit of a break while preventing your man’s tower from becoming the Leaning Tower of Penis.
Get in a new position
We’re probably all familiar with the image of a guy who lies on his back while you go down on him, but you don’t have to be so limited. Let him stand at the edge of the bed while you’re lying on your stomach — or your back if you’d like to give him more of a show. Sixty-nine is a good way to get some while giving some, and I’m all about equality for both partners. Reverse cowgirl can also help to spice things up. Getting down on your knees is always a winning choice because it allows a lot of movement for both parties. There is no harm in asking for a pillow or towel to place under your knees because floors tend to be uncomfortable.
The best thing about blowjobs is that they are totally portable. These can be done just about anywhere incognito — including cars and movie theatres — so learn to love them and take your lovin’ out of the boring ol’ bedroom. Try spicing up your suck sesh with the addition of new sensations like pop rocks, champagne (bubbles) or vibrators.
As always, remember to play safe. There is no harm in blowing a guy with a condom on. Better safe than sorry because herpes is for life. If you’re not digging the flavour of his fuckpost than don’t fear slathering on some lube or politely asking him to take a bath with you pre-play. Most importantly, have fun because blowies often lead to boinking — and that’s fun for everyone.